What Kind Of Gone Are We talking Here?

I have a new favorite song.
Already this year has been filled with coming and going and leaving behind. That's not particularly a bad thing but it sho ain't easy. My sister and I were discussing some things last week about getting rid of the wrong kind of people in your life. I would say the last 3 years were tough for me because I had to let go of some people i cared for dearly. They were no longer conducive to my way of life and how I wanted to raise my family.

There were times I wavered on friendship thinking I was strong enough to keep them around, only to find myself back into old patterns and ways that I was better off without. Essentially coming to know my strengths and weaknesses I realized that there were some people I just couldn't have anymore, regardless of what my heart wanted. They needed to go. They needed to go because they didn't respect my decisions on how I was deciding to live and would be very persuasive in leading me away from my goals. I missed them, but who I gained has filled and over filled any holes they may have left in my heart. I do not regret what I left behind, what I gained has been much more 10 fold.

K, so my sister forgets more songs than I know. She know songs from Ludacris to Johnny Cash and everything in between. A few years ago she and i and another friend went on a cruise. We met many other people we befriended on this cruise and we became an "entourage" of sorts. Each night we ended up in the Piano bar with a Man named Marty Playing Piano. HE WAS AMAZING! If you could invision the song... "the piano man" by Billy Joel, it was just like that. Marty labled our little entourages as "THE GIRLZ" And we basically ended being his back up singers for the weekend. So when he got request people would actually request for "the girls" to sing. It was Great fun! Anyway someone requested "burning ring of fired" by Johnny Cash. I'd never heard it. You know, being a black woman I just didn't swing towards country music unless it crossed over to the pop charts. Anyway, someone request Burning Ring of Fire, so I'm just sitting there clapping along with the rest of the people on the bar and when it comes to the rousing course, I notice my sister just singing along....... like she wrote the darn song. I look over at one friend who loves country and she is all into it as well. I look at our other friends, who happen to be black as well and they are Jacked jawed and bug-eyed with me. Buffie looks at me and say..... "oh my goodness..... ain't no black chick from Detroit got no biznass knowing THAT SONG!" I fell out laughin it was HILARIOUS!

Ok anyway back to the point. My sister and I are talking about people going and coming and what not. As I'm wondering if it would just be easier if a neon sign just showed up on people's forehead with the word "GONE" on it so we would know if they should be in or out of our lives
this song comes on and she telling me... "you HAVE to hear this song..."

Apparently according to the song.... Gone doesn't mean gone anymore. Here's the Chorus:

"Well theres gone for good and theres good and gone
and theres gone with the long before it
I wish she'd been just a little more clear
well theres gone for the day and gone for the night
and gone for the rest of your dogone life
is it whiskey night or just a couple beers
I mean what kind of gone are we talkin bout here..."

Ain't that the truth? Now me and a couple other friends have been talking about "gone" and "leaving" songs and this is just one of many. This absolutely is my favorite! This song caused me to put a country radio station on my car stereo! I'm sure there are probably other country songs worthy of having me program a country station in my car but this was the one that converted me.
So now, when I think of me leaving, or someone else going or even just going to the store I think of this song. Gone IS complicated. What does it actually mean? It's not like saying... "hit the road jack..." things were so simple back in the day, when a person said they were leaving.... they really left. Never came back. THEY KEPT THEIR WORD and we believed them. lol.
These days... leaving means.... "until I miss you then I'll be back until I remember why I left then I'm gone again..."
What kind of gone ARE we talkin here....

Does anyone out there have a favorite Gone or Leaving song?

GET CLOSER

"There's a time
I when I would come runnin'.
I'd drop everything
for the touch of your hand in mine.


You were blind
and now you regret it, '
cause I can't forget it.
It's locked in my mind.

And I can't go on livin' day to day wondering if we'll be here tomorrow.
People change and you're changin'. And I've given you my all, there's no more to borrow.."

GET CLOSER.

What World IS This????

I'd like to know what world did I step into and can I stay for a while????
That last month has been absolutely incredible. It started with the Christmas Holidays filled with so much peace and happiness, at least for me and the majority of my friends. And it's gained even more momentum! And if I had my way, the momentum would not stop there it would increase into one big gigantic snowball and consume everyone I love along the way! Ummm, but not in some psycho kind of way.
As mentioned before my mother called me Monday morning to let me know my Aunt Anna passed away and that my grandmother was probably not too far behind. (Grandma and Anna are Sister's) It reminded me of a few years ago when I had 9 friends and family members pass away within a 12 month span. 6 of them within 60 days and 4 of them within 3 weeks. Although we can't control when people leave us in this life, you hope for the best and that things like this will be at a minimum.
Although I was a little down from the family news I decided to react differently than to slip into a small state of depression and grieving and so on. There's a typical attitude and pattern I have when death confronts me and quite frankly I'm sick of it. I new healthy outlook for death and even LIFE if what was in order. I was quickly forgetting the feelings and goals we made at Christmas.

Tuesday evening I began to get funny little phone calls from my sister. It was the last 30 minutes of my working day and I don't typically answer my cell. I answered and she sort of in a demanding tone asked a me question I wouldn't typically give over the phone nor would i particularly give to anyone else. But she's my older sister, so it was no big deal. A few minutes later she called me back. I couldn't get to the phone but I called her back. She asked for my zip code. I gave it and was asking her what's going on when she said...
"gotta go..." and hung up.
A few minutes later she called me again as I'm walking out of my building for work...
" Hey, what's your SSN?"
And me, being curious give it to her.
"what are you doing?" I demanded!
" Can't talk Im BUSY!" she said... "
I could hear our other sister in the back ground saying....
"girl, just stop trippin and let us do what we're doing..."
And then the line went dead. I jumped in my car and headed home. I decided to call back.... The phone rang.
" Hey what's up?" said my sister.
I was starting to get annoyed...
"Ok, you call me for my ssn, zip code, street address, verify my birth year.... WHAT IS GOING ON?" I demanded.
To which she said. "I can't talk right now..." and hung up again.
"SHE GOT SOME NERVE!" I said to myself.
By this time I'm at home trying not to fume. "ok FINE WHATEVER!" I said to myself and sat in the middle of my living room floor pouting.
I had walked in, took off my coat, kicked off my shoes and just sat in the middle of the floor quietly: No tv. No Radio. No Noise and a small side lamp on. I was waiting. For what, I'm not sure. I let my mind drift off to a friend and the Chaos around his life right now. I'm concerned for him and focusing on others helps my own issues seem lessened. I guess it could be worse, I said to myself. I just sat and listened... To my heart... the voices in my head assuring me... the clock tick.... And then my phone rang.
It was HER again.
Hmmmmm.
"Hello!" I said.
" I need you to write down a number for me...." She said.
"mmmmm hmmmmm.... " I mumbled... "what is it."
She gave me the number. It was actually familiar.
"what are you up to??" I asked... curiously.
"Well I need you to call the number tomorrow after 9 am and tell them you want the title sent to you in less than 30 days." She said.
"WHAT?? What does that even mean" I said
"Just do it after 9am tomorrow" she said giggling.
"Will they know what that means even if I don't? I asked.

She laughed and said... "yeah, they'll know. And if you think about it you'll figure it out..."
And I said.... "figure what out? What are you talkin about ?"
She asked me if I was driving still and I told her I was sitting on the floor... and then I hard my other sister saying
"I can't wait, give me the phone..." And then she jumped on the line and said..

"girl, call that number tomorrow and tell them you want them to send the title to your car as soon as possible... cuz it's not their title anymore..."

"who's car am I driving?" I shrieked in a high pitch voice.... all i need is to be getting in a wreck with someone Else's car... I was thinking...

"Cuz I don't get the title for another year and half....." I was saying...


"Girl, as of about 7 minutes ago It's YOUR CAR! It is now paid off!" I couldn't believe it!

"WHAT??? HOW? WHEN? WHY? WHO?" I was stammering.....

"Girl, we have been trying to get this done for you for the last 2-3 weeks. Have you noticed you haven't had a bill for 2 months? Your daughter had to catch the mail and steal it and give me the info of it and...." My mind was screaming. I couldn't hear a thing she said after that because my mind was screaming.....I couldn't breath..... WOW....... just WOW!

4,200. worth of dept... Obliterated. Gone!. No more. WOW!

She would have to fill me in on the details later because I could not comprehend or process what was going on. I hung up and found myself in the middle of my living room floor sobbing and shaking. I look up and gave a HUGE shout out the Man Upstairs. That feeling, that feeling we held around Christmas was back! I call my mom. Explained to her what just happened.
"as much as you take care of everyone else WHY are you so surprised?" I wasn't sure why. My family just sort of rolls that way.... doing thing kind of thing for those we care about. I think it's ingrained in our DNA. My sister said.... "shoot, I'm just having me some fun doin all this." I know exactly what she means. It's why I do it as well.... to see the joy in others. And THEN she let me in on ANOTHER surprise she's got brewing. I'm Soo excited to pull this one off! Keep the ball rollin, right?!

Can someone please tell me... "WHAT WORLD IS THIS????"

This year is a good year to be in my care Cuz I'm keepin the ball rolling and inviting people to step into my world! Start a ball rolling where you are and make this the year of the Ball.

A' Kin to Some Psycho's?

A friend of mine ask me the other day
"are you kinfolk to some psychics?"
I thought to myself,
"well I'm akin to some Psycho's "

I took me a minute to realize what she was asking. She wanted to know if I had psychics in my family because she seen what she believes is "Psychic" behavior coming from me.
"every since I known you know things that are going to happen before they happen or you know think about people that no body else really knows."

I had to laugh. It's actually true. I shared with her some experiences from my life that might be taken as mystical and strange. But to me and my family it's just normal. I wonder if it's hereditary? I usually don't share these things as most people would consider them Coincidences and they cheapen what I believe to be gifts.
My mother called me this morning. I could tell something was up when in her voice mail she said to have a nice day, like I was a valued customer. My first thinking was...
"uh oh....she's in protecting her young mode."
I believe she reserves this for me when she knows there's going to be something hard on me and possibly cause me to freak out but I need to work through it.

My first instinct was to ignore the voice message and call her back later this evening. But since I was running early for work I decided to call her back. The usual happened and she did some small talk about the weather and the weekend and stuff. And then she told me she was talking to my Aunt. I asked her which Aunt. She meant her sister. My Aunt and my cousin went over to my Grandma's house yesterday to bathe her. Grandma's health has been declining and is getting worse. Grandma told my aunt and cousin last night

" My mama and daddy are coming to get me tonight."

Grandma's parents passed away decades ago. She also refers to a man who keeps bothering her and won't go away.
"that man keeps bothering me..."
We believe the man she's referring to is my Papa who passed away in the early 70's. Last time I saw grandma I remember how she kept looking at me and calling by my mama's name one minute and not knowing who I was the next. She told us stories about how she and papa met and got married. They were HILARIOUS! She would say that man wouldn't leave me alone, he followed me, so I had to marry him. My mother, understanding her condition and knowing her mind isn't quite as sharp as it used to be simply laughed and enjoyed the stories with us. I think the thing that troubled me the most was when she smiled and said, I don't know who you are, girl, but because he let you in, I knew it was ok for you to be here. ("he" being my uncle) It was hard to see her that way.
Not being close to where she is or able to see her often it's always difficult to hear of her declining health.

This morning my mother was calling to tell me that Aunt Anna Passed away. She was 92 years old. She looks JUST like my Grandma. She should, she's my Grandma's Sister. Do you think it is by coincidence that Yesterday my grandma said her mama and daddy were coming to get her, and her sister passed away the very same night? I don't think so. This stuff happens too often for me to believe it's just coincidence. So when grandma also mentions how "that man just keep bothering her" I'm pretty sure she's talking about my Grandfather as well. It's not uncommon for myself or even my mother to have appearances of families of friends come to us through dreams or thoughts and impressions. I'm pretty sure this happens to everyone anyway so it's really no big deal.
One night my papa came to my mother in a dream (papa was my mother's father.) He was in the suite he was buried in. In his hand lay a small casket. He called her by name and told her to open it. My mother didn't open it. He asked her again to open it and again she refused. When Papa asked her why she wouldn't open it, she said "I think i'll see you lying in it. I want to remember you like this, not lying in there." We were awakened the next morning by a phone call very early. It was the husband of my mother's best friend at the time. He had just found her on the kitchen floor, she died of a heart attack somewhere in the early morning.

One of my experiences: I was in college and it was a couple weeks, if that, just after the holidays. My roomates and I were playing some sort of game and the phone rang. I jumped up and answered the phone and it was my mom. I heard her voice she simply called my name. Before she could say anything more I said to her "Grandmother died." She responded "Oh, you've talked to your father and he's told you." I replied, "no, She just told me herself." It was true, my Grandmother had passed away. There have been times when I've heard her voice, felt her hug and smelled her purfume, especially in times when I've been alone and afraid. There have been multiple occassions in my life with these experiences and some of them have passed on to my daughter. Are we psychic? Not by any stretch of the imagination. I believe everyone has the opportunity to have these experiences. I just feel that some are more in tune to the next life than others. I believe it's a learned thing and I also believe it's a gift. We all have certain gifts that those around us may not have. I think this is just one of those.

When my mother told me my aunt passed away last night the first thing that came to my mind was "this is great, now I'll get to know her even better than when she was alive." I suprized myself in thinking that, because I wasn't sure what that meant. I'm still not sure what it means.
My mother also suggest I be prepared to hear from Papa. She thinks, as i do, that Papa is trying to get Grandma's attention. But she never really listened to him when he was alive. I guess some things never change :). Mom said I'm the one most likely to get any messages. We believe he's going to be the one to come and get Grandma since they've been apart over 30 years. I guess since she saw her parents coming, it won't be too long befor she recognizes "that man messing with her" is her husband coming to bring her home. Shes' my last surviving Grandparent. I'm nos sure if I'll be able to get back to see her before she leaves but I've been filling my mind lately of as many memories as I can of all my Grandparents. My Grandfather, my Father's dad just passed away early Autumn, about 3 months ago. In some ways you rejoice because their suffering is complete. In other ways you cry because all you have left is memories of them.
I'm positive they would have us remember them with laughter and love. It would sadden them for us to focus on their absence instead of creating ways to keep them near. I'm very impressed with a familywhere the father passed away. It is a mother with 2 small children. This family speak of Dad as if he'll be home with them tomorrow or later to night around dinner time. It's amazing to me.
A conversation would be something to the effect of
"my dad is going to love the model air plane I'm going to make. That's one of his favorite things it to build and fly them. So when I'm finished I'm going to go fly it for him!"

Some may think, "that poor kid doesn't know that daddy is not around." ON THE CONTRARY... that kid understands that even though he cannot see daddy, daddy is STILL around. And there are times when he can make daddy proud or disappoint daddy as if he could see him.
I'm grateful for lessons such as these that remind us that we are just as connected as family in life as we are in death.
I didn't know Aunt Anna well at all. I knew who she was but didn't know her. I spent the day thinking of her and shedding tears and Im not sure why. But I realized today how powerful the connection of family can be, even family we don't know so well still is connected to who we are. A part of me mourned for Aunt Anna today and it was a real loss and pain in my heart. I'm not sure I understand why I cried for this family member I didn't know. But I know I felt a real connection of love for. I know now, more than ever, the strength of family ties are eternal.

Looking Back On 2007

This was a tough year for just about everyone I know including myself. For me it was one of the greatest experiences I've ever had. I'm not so naive as to associate great with all happiness and smiles. 2007 was great with growth and struggles and fears and it was equally great with over coming them. Greatness comes with growth and change. I would like to think I accomplished some of my greatest changes for good this last year.
The world really starting "clicking" this year. I'm able to look back a specific times and incidences and pin point exactly the "AH HA!" moment where in that moment of time the world came together.

I learned much more about the character of people around me, who they really are. I made some tough decisions on who to keep around and who to let go. I let got of some people I love but were not particularly great travel partners. When I say travel partners I mean even though they were people I love, respect, had a wonderful time being with I had to move them to the back seat because they would distract me from my main journey. Read my "Journal of a Black Mormon Girl".
I'm grateful for those with whom I've gained true friendship. These are those who are still around. Some of my travel partners got upset when I focused on the purpose of my Journey. In their desperation they tried to barter and bargain. I often felt this was a great disrespect for who I am and what I believed and was trying to accomplished. In my opinion anyone who knows what you stand for and what you believe and they impose their desires upon you which are not conducive to your goals and focus is not only disrespectful, it's manipulative. I love these people, they are my friends and in some instanced even more. I traveled with them off and on, we would fight and argue then make up and be friends then fight and argue. Until the day came when I finally asked myself why am I compromising my values and goals for those who aren't respecting my values and goals? Although I enjoy the time I spend with them for the most part, the distraction effects my goals and my family goals. These decisions are hard when hearts are involved.
I learned to let go. Man, I tell ya, this is one of THE HARDEST things to do in life. I got fed up with waking up with a sinking feeling of failure each day. I found strength in my family and the example I wanted to be to my daughter's, nieces, nephews and the others who I have a strong influence on. I found myself believing one way and living another. I tried always to teach the right thing but that wasn't working out for me. I could not live one way and tech my family another and have it be truly effective.I'll always remember the look of disappointment on my daughters face when I would engage in things or allow somethings to happen that shouldn't have.
Living in that kind of chaos, stress and guilt each day took it's toll on me. I decided to fight for myself and my family.
When we make decisions to make changes in our life it feels as if the whole world around us resists. I guess the world wants to make sure we're serious about the changes and will throw everything in out way to frustrate the situation to make sure we're serious and strong enough to make those changes we desire. Depending on where u really are in you're life you'll either cave to the pressure and revert back or allow that pressure to diamonize you. Diamonds end where pressure begins. There was great resistance in myself and in others for the changes needed. I even has situations arise that I thought were LONG GONE. Each time I took a deep breath and said... "Bring it on." When it came I cried and wined and cussed and pushed people away. It hurt. It hurt so bad it doubled me over. It hurt so bad some days I just couldn't get out of bed. It hurt so bad sometimes i just slept so I wouldn't have to sleep and other days it work me up so I couldn't sleep. It wasn't pretty but I went through it. The Ugly and the bad I went through it. I revisited those pains and angers that I kept stuffing down and went through it. I kept coming up and I kept going through it because when it comes up, it comes up to purge its self from you, and only then can the healing begin. I got me all sorts of healing done in 2007. And it feels good.

I faced 3 of my greatest fears this year. I wont share them here, those who know me already know what they are. I tell you there is almost nothing greater than facing that fear and overcoming it. Each fear I've encountered I tried to remember you cannot have fear and faith. And it's in those moment where you learn who you really are and what you're capable of. Knowing that and mastering who you are a great key to happiness. It provides faith in yourself and in in whatever higher power you choose to believe in. For me, that would be God.
I know that I can face whatever fears I have, rational or not and be ok. And as crazy as it sounds.... Just keep spiders away from me, I'm not there yet with spiders.

I became absolutely wonderful this year. People tell me this all the time. I just started believing how right they are. It took me 40 years to fall in love... with myself. My crazy hair. My voluptuous body. My mind. And my ability to draw people in. Even people I don't care for would like to friends. And if those i don't even care for love me also and think I'm fabulous, who am I NOT to believe that REALLY am absolutely fabulous? Exactly. I've learned my boundaries. I have learned when I have to walk away, stay away, shut my mouth, scream inside while smiling outside. I like that my family and friends recognize when those times are. I rec'd a call one day from someone I was just peaked with. They kept phoning and phoning and phoning. Then my daughter answered my phone and let them know... "you may not know this, but she is staying away from you for YOUR benefit, not hers. It may be best for you to just step off for a bit and let her come to you or you probably will not like the outcome." (Thank heaven for little girls.) I know myself well enough to know when I need to stay away. I've learned to respect that about me, because there were times when I crossed my own boundaries and the aftermath has not been pretty at all. Knowing and sticking to your boundaries is a good thing.

2007 I tried to purge those things that were plaguing me spiritually. This was hardest of all. But it was so so so so worth it. It feels good to be good and to be doing good. It feels good to know that I've stopped trying to do the right things and are actually doing the right things. People try all their lives to accomplish things and never get passed the trying to actually doing. I am doing the right things and that feels good. I'm not saying there aren't times when I get frustrated because it looks like those not doing the right things are getting all the things I want. But I know that looks are deceiving. I'm deciding to put my all into what I know is right and I've never been happier. My family has never flourished more. Those people and places and things I thought I'd miss have been compensated for by other people, places and things. The pain dulls and the joy surrounds and overcomes it.

Focus on what matters most. I had a tendency to focus on the hear and now. I want what i want when I want it. I think I know what's best because I know how good I feel when I get what I want. I have come to realize, although it may be feeling good now, is it hindering my future and my final resting status? These things have become important to me. I've many friend who feel they are beyond striving for that eternal happiness so they're just going to go with the flow. I've decided I'm going down kicking and screaming. No body can say I quit and went with the crowd. I'm not quitting and I'm no longer willing to settle. 2007 taught me how to be a fighter.



Looking back on 2007 it truly has been one of the greatest experiences in my life. I'm looking forward to what 2008 brings all it's ups and downs and hills and valley's. I plan on continuing to just get better with age and time. And I plan on encouraging that greatness in those around me.
Welcome 2008!

Because Someone Else Gave

When the holidays come do we start to spend
As a token of what we can’t say?
Is it making up for time unspent
of the things we should do everyday?

As we open our boxes and stocking and bags
Wrapped in nice little paper and bows.
Do we scoff at a trinket and wonder the cost
With a smirk and upturned nose?

How often do we simply brush gifts aside
Unwelcome and left in the shade?
Forgetting the only reason we have received
Was because somebody else also gave?

The importance of giving is a key part of life
remember it down through the age?
God loved us so much
And for our lives to touch
His only begotten… he gave.

So unselfish a gift he presented the earth
a savior to show us the way
for there is no other perfected enough
to give us great hope every day.

This only begotten he sent us
his life was to make us all free
his focus unwaivering
his teachings of love
instructing us just how to be


While his time here on earth was not very long
his impact will surely amaze
his path clearly marked
from the time of the start
until now in these latter days

when his time came to suffer the sins
of each child, woman and man
his body then bled
and the pains of us shed
he would not deviate from the plan.

The only begotten given to the earth
to save the sons of man
then have him self again to us
to fulfill Heavenly Father’s plan.

Do we take this as trinkets we discard to the side
cuz it’s not what we wanted to get?
Do we scoff at how little money was spent
and compare the value met?

In all that you purchase with checks and with cards
and with cash and coupons on hand
how often do you think of the love you can give
to him, your fellow man?

Real Love can’t be found
in pretty wrapped boxes
or stocking and festive bags
the greatest of gifts can be found any place
ours was in swaddling rags

these rags held a baby brought into the world
by the father , who wanted to give
and again these rags were draped on the one
who died so that you might live.

When the time comes upon us
once again to show just a token of love
Do we spend our hard cash on
nick knacks and stuff
or do we take example from above?

Instead of gifts with the glitter and glow
and lights that go flashing all day
Remember the only reason you have received…
was because someone, with love, for you gave.

Karyn M. Dudley © 2006

Karma... baby.... KARMA!

Some Colleagues and I were talking about Karma, and how much we love her.

One of them mentioned how his Parents: father and step-mom were getting a divorce. Here lies the scenario....

The Father met the step-mom while his Mom and Dad were still married. Apparently the marriage was on the rocks and divorce was going to happen eventually. Step mom befriended that dad and they became very close. Too close for a man who still was technically married. I guess his father didn't really divulge that he was married and therefore encouraged what should have been taboo closeness. Mom found out and blew a freaking gasket. Step mom found out about the wife.
Now Karma says
"a decent woman, or any woman respectful of God, herself (especially herself), bonds of marriage and the man she's interested in should have backed off until a divorce was final. They could be friends from a distance but let the husband and wife figure their stuff out and get whatever they're going to do finalized and done before moving in."
Weeelllll..... Step mom didn't do that. In fact, she "supported him" by encouraging the closeness of their inappropriate friendship in fact, she poured it on and threw herself at him every way possible making herself available to provide all the things the current wife wasn't providing emotionally, physically and so forth thus encouraging him to be in favor of divorce . Before the divorce was final their relationship was very inappropriate.
Karma says.. "
dang, at least wait for the ink to dry on the divorce papers, ms shameful."
A short time after the divorce was final Dad married step mom. Sure there were troubles as any marriage would have. No one could really tell there were trouble because together they posed a united front. But deep down inside, step mom was always wondering where dad was, who he was with, what he was hiding and so on and so forth. I guess what it came down to is she could never truly trust him because he sort of was with her inappropriately while still being legally married. She was always fearful about him meeting... someone who would not encourage him to make sure he'd done all he can to save the marriage. Meeting someone who would inappropriately encourage him to become emotionally close and attached in a way that may be not quite right for someone who is not exactly available. She was afraid he had friends who was basically just like her. I guess she figured out.... Step mom should have let that man alone until everything was final. She should have given him some breathing room to get things taken care of with his former wife and family making sure their welfare was secure and on track. And then she should have allowed him to take sometime for himself, regroup, find out who he is at this time in his life and what he wants and allowed him to get himself completely together. She should have had enough respect for herself to not wanna be THAT woman or even the REBOUND woman. Cuz THAT woman is paranoid, insecure and full of doubts as well. And so was her marriage. It's not really known if Dad did anything inappropriately while being married to step mom, but Karma says: "if someone will cheat with you, they will cheat on you." AMEN to that.

Props to your mama, Jackson, for putting up with that crap then and for being able to hold her head up and smile at her life right now.

This is why I love Karma!

I KNOW I'm Not The Only One....

I know I'm not the only one who wants a taser.

I mentioned it the other day to a few people and recieved some shocked looks. But the more I talked about wanting one, the more they started to admit they wanted one too. There is a world-size closet full of people who want tasers!

I was pricing them the other day and found one for 350$. That's not so bad. They come in a couple different colors as well: Basic black, grey, silver, blue and pink. That's right I said PINK!

I'm no so crazy about the color pink, but I'd get a pink taser. That's the ULTIMATE ego blow:

"the perpetrator went down from a pink hello kitty taser!" ( heere kitty Kitty KITTY KITTY!) Awesome! You can bling it out like you do your cell phones with stickers and rhinestones and alla that.

So in most states tasers are legal. You only have to be 18 and complete a back ground check since they aren't considered firearms. I'm thinking about getting my daughter one when she goes off to college. With the way college campuses are these day I think it's a good idea.

I've been reading alot about cops getting taser happy. I couldn't be a cop for a few reasons: I'd shoot first and ask questions later. the good thing about that is I wouldn't shoot to kill, I'd just shoot to stop, you know, blow out a knee cap if someone is running, or an elbow or wrist if I think someone is going to go for a weapon. Just my luck I'd hit an artery and kill someone. But the great thing would be, I could TASE someone instead. But I'd get taser happy too. I read about the guy who felt the cop shouldn't have stopped him and he got all macho and lippy in front of his wife and kids. I KNOW I would have tazed him, too. There's just a standard of respect that you give people who have weapons. I don't care who wrong I think a cop may be, i'm not going to turn my back on him before he's done with me. I'm really not gonna get in his face and get lippy. I'm not saying that's what the guy did, I'm just saying I've seen it done before and knowing the kind of person I was, I'd tase someone simply for disrespect. Yeah, I could never be a cop. Which is sad because one of my best friends and I always dreamed about being cops together. I'd be the bad cop, he'd be the good cop. *

sigh*

We even spoke in code:

"The eagle is in the nest!"

or from our favorite TV series M*A*S*H

"The wind just broke his leg."

I miss him! He actually did become a cop. I loved living vicariously through him. Even better he went on to become a Secret Service Agent. I really love hearing about his SS stories. ( ummmmmmm... of course the unclassified one's ;) hmmmmmmmm. I wonder if he has a taser, or could get one on the BFF discount?

In all my conversations about tasers the passed few days I've actually come across people who WANT to be tased so they know what it feels like. I could provide that service for them!

I'd open up a kiosk in the mall where I would taze you for $7.50. And I would taze your friend for 5$. There could be a 2 for 1 special on valentines day: "Happy Valentines... TAZE!" or " Proved my love with a valentines taze". T-shirt for $10. One of my friends suggested "Taser Tag!" Well why not? If people would pay to run around the woods getting shot up with balls of paint, why not stick them in a maze with tazers?

I'm more than happy to provide this as a service!

So I think I've come to the conclusion that I'll defineately at some point get a taser. And I've narrowed it down to the pink or blue one. I'll get it with Raggedy Ann on one side and "don't dis da doll" on the other.

yeah, I want a taser. Who's with me?

40 and FABULOUS!

A week ago today was my 40th birthday and it was FABULOUS! I'm going to be one of those women who does not care if people know my age! I came into my 39th year fearful and broken. I could feel that all hell was about to break loose but I also knew it had. I've learned much about myself this last year. I finally realized what I want and what I need to do to get it. The world started "clicking" this year. I figured out myself and what works for me and against me. I know there are certain things I absolutely MUST do to get certain results. No compromise, no questions asked and more importantly NO SHORT CUTS. The effort is worth the results. As I look back an my 39th year I see smoke, ash, stifled fires, and a plethora of broken dream and ideals that did not suite me. It was a year of scattered debris as I fought to get my life back on track. I find myself smiling as I close the door to that vision and lock it. To me, it is gone. That door is closed, never to be opened again. I am EXCITED for year 40. There is a mysterious anxiousness to move forward and learn and experience and grow. There's sweet relief in realizing who you are and whose you are. No longer a fear of the unknown but an excitement in the adventure of it.

Let's talk about my Birthday party. When planning the big FOUR-OH party I initially envisioned a black and white semi-formal affair. Nice dinner, some music, really elegant and nice. So I put the idea in motion. The more I put it in motion the more out of sorts I felt.
I said to myself, "I've maybe been elegant 3 times in my life. This is just not me." So I scrapped that idea. Someone asked me what I was doing and I told them probably nothing. That's when they said... "we should go to that pizza parlor where we have so much fun!" DING DING DING! The bless went off in my head. I had flash backs of being a little girl and daddy always asking me, "So what are we going for you birthday dinner?" "PIZZA!" I'd always say. And what do you want for your birthday the parents would ask. RAGGEDY ANN & ANDY! It was the perfect idea. We had the birthday party at Mountain Mike's Pizza. This place had pool tables, air hockey, video games and such. It was awesome!
We ordered pizza, garlic cheese sticks, drinks and so on.

I had a white cake with strawberry filling. It had a pictures of Raggedy Ann and hugging her teddy bear
.
I LOVED IT!

There was about 60 people in the back room. 17 of them were kids and 9 of them were age 8 and under. I requested white elephant gifts. It's always been more fun for me to give away gifts then to give them. Everyone 8 and under received a gift and a handful of candy I had rec'd from my work party. I had all the adult anty up on whatever quarters we had and then we handed them out to the kids and patted them off to the video games. It didn't matter that they weren't good at the video games or pool or air hockey. THEY WERE LOVING EVERY MINUTE OF IT, and so was I. The kids on the game floor, parents in the party room listening to music, relaxing and socializing. I split my time with the kids and the parents until time to open cards and gifts. A couple of the little kids handed me my gifts to open. They were happy to hand them to me and pick up the wrapping. After cake and gifts, more games and dancing in the party room. I went to check on the smaller kids and noticed a couple of the bigger kids playing air hockey. I'm not sure what happened but something inside of me got the urge to "body surf" across the air hockey table. Before my forty year old body could stop my four year old mind, I did a body dive across the air hockey tables in the middle of their game. IT WAS AWESOME! The kids laughed and jumped up and down and clapped. A couple of the adult came out and saw me across the table, legs dandling in the air over the sides. I'm SURE they thought I had some accident that landed me across the table. Nope, it was all me. Perhaps it was one last stretch and saying goodbye to youth and those carefree childhood things.

Naw, that's not it. Because about an hour later I did it again! My Fortieth birthday was AWESOME! My only regret is that when I look back on such an amazing day, I will miss the faces and smiles of those who couldn't make it. And if that's the only regret I have, then that's not so bad, I guess they were there in spirit.
I have a feeling this "fabulous and forty" year is going to be phenomenal! I've never been more at peace with myself.
Something happens at the age of Forty: A light came on. Madea said if your light doesn't come on by that time "Check yo bulb." The greatest thing so far is giving myself permission to be happy. And REALIZING it's not worth throwing away eternal blessings for temporary desires. Been there, done that. It's such a GREAT feeling knowing you are doing the right things. I'm sleeping at night, I'm happier, I'm more able to deal with things of stress better. And I'm less stressed. How shameful it took 40 years to get to that point.
Cheers for at least another 40 years putting it all into practice.

FORTY AND FABULOUS!

Don't Get It Twisted

...And don't let my absence fool you.

I own the Sandbox, all the marbles and other toys in it.

Don't start no stuff, wont be no stuff.

Take your insecurities and Jealousy and be off with you, little one.

Love encourages respect, trusts, and brings peace, not selfishness, manipulation and frustration.

Desperation in such an ugly thing to witness

I will not be moved or stayed

I will not be controlled.

In my time and on my terms

Time and Distance are best friends


I will act out of love for those I do love.

Those who love me will act from their love for me.

My people will do what is right, regardless of the wrong pressed upon them

I am Wonderful, Gorgeous, Fun, Amazingly Talented, Spiritual, Obnoxious, Loud, Crazy.

Kids and puppies Adore Me... as they should.

The WHOLE ShaBANG.

Consider me a threat.... a force to be reckoned with.


(Don't make the ghetto chick come out in me again.... y'all hear?)

Raising The Bar!

Nooooooooooooooo, not THAT bar. Not the Liquor bar either.

Bring on..... the Cereal bar. One of the fun parts about my job is as a Senior Customer Support Rep... at least for now... we get to do things to bring up the department morale and promote unity and achievement of shared goals.
For November/December, it's MY turn to be the chairperson of all of that. Last month we hit the Octobefest theme really thick. I'm suprized I didn't gain 50 lbs with all the bratwurst, crackers, cheese,pretzels and apple beer floating around the department. And we topped it off with, of course, me as the beautiful butterfly for halloween!
Im happy, because I actually lost weight. Gotta love it when that happens.




Well for November I am absolutely fooded out. So what did I plan? Another food thing of course. But nothings as heavy as what we had for October. I just wanted to lay low and take it easy since it feels like we've been playin catch-up all year.

What i proposed was Cold Cereal Bar! Oh I have a special love of the cold cereal. My Daddy worked at Kelloggs, ya know. I'm really tight with tucan same, Cornelius, Snap, Crackle, Pop, Diggem' and Tony Tiger. Theyz my homies and have been a part of my whole life!
I took a Poll and asked everyone in the department their favorite cold cereal. Never in my life did I realize there were so many other NASTY cereals out there. I AM partial to kelloggs. Kelloggs and post are less than 5 miles apart in the city I grew up in. And you could tell when Post burt the post toasties :-P the city stank for days.

When I went off to college, my daddy sent me a case of the mini fruit loop boxes, a case of the mini raisin bran boxes and a case and a half of the Strawberry Frosted PopTarts. He called it "breakfast food storage." I called it "INCOME!" That's right I sold off much of my stock to those poor college students who where broke but shared a love of the Cold Ceral like myself. Oh I was my best marketing director.
My roomate Pam sitting at the breakfast table eating her yogart. Me, munching down a couple small boxes of Fruit loops.
"Hey Pam" says I

"You need some fruit loops with your yogart, girl."

"Huh?" she says?

" You're missing the fruit loops with your yogart" I repeated.

"I'm not sure what you mean" She says.

BIG SIGH! "WHAT?????? you mean you don't crush up fruit loops in your yogart? Girl, where are you from? You put peanut butter on pancakes, but not fruit loops in Yogart?"

I walk over and crush a couple of fruit loop on her spoon full of strawberry yogart.

"Go ahead, give it a try..."

She obeys.

"Hey that's yum! I really like it!"

Well you know it's only 50 cents a box. Did you want one or two boxes?

"gimme 2 of em."

CHA-CHING!

Eventually 1/3 of the apartment complex are regular customers

I'm walking through the courtyard and I see good ole Bubba.
"Hey BUBBA! What's up my southern Studd!" I call out.
"Hey Sweet chocolate, come and gimme some sugar!" man I loved them southern boyz.

"Bubbz, where did you say your brother is on his mission?" I ask

"Oh he went to France." he says.
About this time I start cracking up trying to picture a southern boy speaking French.

"well you know, they can't get the stuff they're used to over there. Why don't you come by and buy a couple mini boxes of Cereal for his care pkg. I'll even throw in a box of strawberry frosted Poptarts for free, since he's doing the Lord's work!"

" Sweet chocolate I love the way you think! I'll be by directly!"

CHAH CHING!

***Side note! I luvz me some southern boyz. That apartment full of southern boyz was very very good to me! I had a car and that is a luxury at college. People would want to borrow it to get groceries and things and I would cost 1$ to get my car keys and then another dollar for everyone who was riding in the car.

CHAH CHING!

But them southern boyz after the first time they borrowed my car, I stopped charging them. Because when they returned my car, the gas tank was willed, the car washed inside and out and if it was time th oil would be changed too. Did i say I luv me some southern boyz? After a while I stopped charging them period.


Ok back to my cold cereal bar. Wendesday we had a cold cereal bar for work. IT WAS AWESOME! there were about 10/15 diffent kinds of cold cereal to choose from. There was so much cereal left over, we had cold cereal bar this morning at work too. And there is STILL some left over, so for tomorrow, YUP, cold cereal bar. Everyone loves it!
Who doesn't like cold cereal?
Think about it. It's the middle of the night you can't sleep. The late show, late late show, and much too late show have just gone off. The only thing left are your insomnia and infomercials.
Your stomach growls a little so you grab a bowl, get the ice cold milk, open the cupboards and pull out a box of.. mmmmmmmm!
Sugary sweetness!
Fruit loops, Strawberry Shredded mini wheats, Captain crunch w/ crunch berries, I gotta have my pops cuz I am coo koo for cocoa puff, they're Grrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeaaaaaaaat!

So what if the spoonful was so big that the cereal is tearing up the roof of your mouth! It takes you back to saturday mornings in your pajama's watching the superfriends at the hall of justice.... wondering what the wondertwins marvin and wendy are going to "Activate" into now, or if Pinky and the Brain will EVER figure out how to take over the world.

I recommend a cold cereal bar. Suggest it at work next friday. If your office doesn't have a budget for it , then just tell your people to bring their favorite cold cereal and a bowl, and you'll supply the milk. I bet your office will soon be after your lucky charms!

200 lbs of Red Potatoes!

300 lbs of red potatoes! That's what's in my "Bu" right now. "Bu" is the name of my car. And she's got 3/100 pound bags of potatoes in her back seat.
My supervisor at work mentioned her neighbor has a potato farm and is selling 100 pound bags of potatoes for 20$. That's a lot of funerals. I decided to get me a bag, or two. The third bag is for a friend. She likes potatoes!
I thought wow, I love me some red potatoes! And I have some friends who love them some red potatoes too! They probably wouldn't mind a pound or two.
I don't mind sharing with my friends and family. WOW 200 pounds. That's alotta potatoes! I can scallop them, au grauten them, fry them, bake them, mash em smash em. There's potato casserole, potato pancakes, potato chips. Ohhhhhh, cream of potato soup! I have the most amazing recipe for it! MMMM Cheesy cream of potato soup, even better. Potato logs, twice
baked potatoes.

Fries! Curly Fries! Seasoned curly fries! Potato dumplings. Potato Salad. German Potato Salad. HASH BROWNS :)

Let's think, some other things you can do with potatoes:
You can put it in someone's exhaust pipe, Drop it from the top of a skyscraper, play dodge ball with them. Mash them and have "snowball" fight! carve them into little sculptures and figurines, use them as stamps or stencil on artwork, I found a link for mashed potato cookies:http://www.recipezaar.com/27684 I ain't trying it but if someone out there does, let me know. I hear if you mash them and make them stiff enough and add food coloring you can mold things: Mountains, ashtrays, cups, candy dishes. I guess if you let them sit long enough they will be the 'mold" thing. Bwahh haa haaa!
A long time ago one of my friends made a spud cannon! SPUDZUKA! Wow, or a catapult would be cool, and sling shot them at targets in a field. You could do that, but that would just be wasteful.

Potatos, potatos, Potatos. I LIKE POTATOS! "Specially the red ones. I feel sorry for you die hard atkins diet freaks! I like the atkins diet actually, but I know when to aktins and I know when to eat potatoes and this winter, is all about sharing the love of carbs.
You may think what in the world is she going to do with all those potatoes?

Welp lets see
I can give 200 friends 1 pound each. Or I can give 1oo friends 2 pound each. I can give 4 friends 50 pounds or, I can give 3 friends 50 pounds and keep 50 pounds myself. I can make potato starch alcohol and sell it in the back woods of Benjamin :)

I could build a model of the solar system with potatoes. Someone suggested I make the world's largest potato salad and get in the guinness book of world records. I could invite all my friend over for a potato bar dinner. Hey, just bring the toppings, I have the potatoes.


What can you top a potato with?
Chili, cheese, and chili-cheese, sour cream, ranch dressing, bacon, cream of mushroom soup, gravy, cream chip beef, cream of chicken, taco meat and other taco fixins, broccoli and cheese sauce, Chicken ala king, Delux that baby out with green onions/sour cream/cheese/bacon/chives, cubed steak/onion/mushrooms, stroganoff, chicken ala king!

WOW. You can do so much with potatoes, who knew?


MMMM! Potatoes. Guess what my friends are getting for Christmas? :)


What would YOU do with 200 lbs of red potatoes?

Halloween @ The Office

Wordless Wednesday

Alrighty Then....................!

K, so it's 10 minutes after midnight.... early halloween! Some strange things have been happening the last couple hours:

I'm talking on the phone to my mom and suddenly there's a baby crying on my doorstep. At first I think it's just the neigbors passing though up the stairs, but the crying doesn't stop. Matter of fact it gets louder. So I poke my head through the blinds of the sliding class and there's this HUGE yellow cat. I really don't like cats. This thing was screetching like a hungry baby. I've never heard a cat sound like that before. And it was right on my front step. Weird.

Today, I saw one of the computer tech guys outside, in the rain and wind running through the parking lot hands raised with what looked like a tarp or partial parachute flapping in the wind behind him like a cape. I know I looked jack jawed and bugg-eyed. I looked around to see if anyone else was around to see it. Nope, no another person in sight, just me and the generic superman running through the company parking lot in the middle of the day. Weird.


Customer calls me today and asks.... "is your office closed tomorrow for the halloween holiday?"
I choked out a " ma'am we are regular business hours tomorrow..." and did my call closing routine and hung up before I burst out laughing on the phone. Weird.


Ok so for about the last hours, I've been hearing a whistle in my house. I check on my daughter and she's asleep so it's not her. There's no wind and the sound is not even coming from the window. My apts not really that big so it's not coming from some obscure place. It sounds as if it's starting in the living room. And then maybe from my bathroom, and then the hallway. It's coming from diffrent parts of the house. I thought maybe someone was outside the window in this office whistling for their dog or maybe that stupid cat. Nope, none of that was the case.
Besides, this isn't just any whistle. This is.. "THE FAMILY WHISTLE." Yes, tha's right our family has a whistle. (Doesn't everybody's?) If we're in a store or someplace and looking for each other we just send out that family whistle. When the other members of the family hear it, they whistle back and we just follow the sounds of the whistle. I thought maybe my daughter was playing tricks on me... but she is sound to sleep... and she doesn't even know the family whistle, that was an old time thing i do with my parents and siblings. When the neices and nephews want us, they just call on the cell phone anyways. I called my sister to see if she's playin tricks. She's not, she's 45 min away staying with friends. But as I was calling her the whistles started again. A sort of warmth ran through me. Then a chill. I was telling her what's going on.
"you know?" I said.... "come to think of it.. besides you and me lookin for each other in walmart the only one's I've really heard whistle the family whistle the most are Grandpa and Grandmother!"

Well, Grandmother passed away 20 years ago and Grandpa just joined her 2 months ago.

I wonder if they're playing "hide and seek" tonight for halloween? Weird.

WHAT??? A FREAKIN' BUTTERFLY????

So the department has been talking about Halloween the passed 2 weeks and what to dress up as.
I Usually go with such ghetto lazy costumes:
Show up to work in Pajama's. "what are you for halloween?" they'd ask. "I'm tired" I'd say.
Regular clothes. "what are you for halloween?" "serial killer, they look like everyone else"
Dress with a jumper and 2 pony tails. What are you for halloween. " a doll"

I think I haven't seriously dressed up since about 1990. I was a Genie or a Harem girl. I found some mc-hammer type pants that were sheer and ballooned out. Found some ballet slippers to fit my big ole feet and a genie-esk shirt. I pulled up my waist long braids into the "I Love Genie" Pony tail and off I went. I went to a couple parties, won a couple prizes...when people got on my nerves I would fold my arm, look directly at them, and do that famous "I Love Genie" nod. yeah, it didn't work they would never disappear.

Last year I was a Lepard which really isn't a stretch for me. I have so much lepard skin clothing and other things that I just put it on, did a cat nose and afro'd out my hair.

The year before... a Gypsie. Again no big stretch, Put on a peasant blouse and broomstick skirt with a scarf arouond the head. I actually took some crystals off of a candle stick and used them for earrings. I would slam the palm of my hand on people's foreheads all day and read their fortune for a peice of chocolate. ( I'm ghetto like that)


Wellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll. This year is going to be a stretch. We were talking about dressng up as something that would fit our personalities. (No I'm not going to be a witch, and if you take off the w and put in a b i'm not going to be that either.) Some of the guys were thinking of pulling off a transformer look. My mind is thinking maybe a transvestite look would be better? In the passed we've had clown, babies, chickens. One year we even had a pimp daddy. Which reminds me of a little guy who once called himself... "Big Pimpin". Seriously he looked more like "little Pimple" but who was I to mess up his fun? As they were thinking of things to be that were supposed to be tailored to their personality, I decided to go the opposite.

As each person disclosed what they were thinking the question came back to me.
So, KayDee... what are you going to be this year?

"a butterfly"

I answered. They watched me with smiles... waiting for the catch.

"Yeah...? they said... "what kind...?"

"um... a blue butterfly" I said.


" ok.....and..?" they said..

" uh...... a baby blue butterfly?" I answered.... wondering if I was back in high school and making a good educated guess on the answer to "x = ?"


"Nuh-uh!" Said one of the girls. "No way, If I know you, that's not it at all! What? You have a stick of butter costume with wings???"
"the gang agreed.."
" I can see you as a wasp or a bee. Will you go around pinching us?"
(that did sound like something I would probably do.)

" nope! No pinches. Butterflies are soft and gentle, they tickle, they're delicate! I'm going to be a butterfly"

Their mouths dropped.

I just told them I was going to be the oppostie of what I am: I'm a klutz, I'm heavy handed, hard footed, loud, rowdy, and all of that.

My thoughts were broken.....

"WHAT? A FEAKING BUTTTERFLY?..... aw C'mon!" She was disgusted!
It was funny to see the disappointment in her face. I had to laugh.

"Sorry, No ghetto Gangsta Generic innercity suburbia costume this year! This year you get a butterfly."
I did my best ballet butterfly move across the department floor, twirled on my does, spread my wings as if to fly... and darn near twisted my ankle.

Yeah people, a freakin butterfly. That's all your getting for halloween outta me. It may be the only way I'll earn some wings.

Trick? or Treat?

Grazin & Cornmazin Part 2

Mountain Mike's Pizza was the place! We had the joint all to ourselves. I was carrying little man because we put his shoes in the trunk and their they would stay until he went home. The Mellow Crew was already there getting a table set up. I WAS A MESS. We were all a mess. Filthy dirty. Not just filthy, not just dirty, but filthy dirty. I Looked at the guy behind the counter
"do you mind if I just kick my shoes off at the door?"
"thats fine" he smiled.

"Oh I already told him that this night would be unlike any other night they've ever seen."
yelled Aunty

"Good!" I said.
And then the fun began. We were all getting situated around the table.

Someone told me earlier that Little man had a crush on Doodle-bug.
(sorry little man, that's just the way it is around siblings... nothing is sacred)

So the seating was arranged so he could sit with her during pizza. You should have seen the big ol grin on his face. She, appreciating his admiration made sure he was well taken care of all night. She even rode him piggy back up 3 flights of stairs to his home at the end of the night!

There was literally no one else in the place. We were loud and boisterous and rowdy and cracking up about the maze things. It was a party... with entertainment....
STARRING:
Dip & Dap!
I love these two girls. Well I love them all but these two girls.... are just outta control. When one would start to slow down, the other would hit like a recharge button. Even ordering Pizza and drinks was a show. At one point I laughed so hard I couldn't even sit up in my chair. My head was practially in the lap of K-bug all night!
You know that kind of laughter when you are just sooo weak and hurt soo much that all you can do is breath and cry? Yeah it was JUST like that. Couple that with muddy butts and muddy shoes and sugar..... you have a party that can't be stopped
While waiting for the food to arrive Sandra and little man made up this game of table hockey:

Think of a regular air hockey table. Now replace that with a typical table at a pizza parlor.
The hockey puck... is the parmesian cheese shaker. The hockey paddles are the salt and pepper shakers. If the cheese falls in your lap, the opponent scores. If it's shot over the edge of the table or onto the next table... Little man will announce:
"YOU ARE OWT!"
Sandra and little man were going at it, it was a good game. And when they finished Dip & Dap got on the other ends of the table... so this table hockey game played out between the 4 of them... and the rest of us cheered as if we were at a real hockey game. It was awesome and we continued this game until the pizza came!

Our poor server, he didn't know what to do. We had shakers and napkin holders all set up on the table looking like a hockey rink with us cheering and booing and commentating. I'm not sure how long he stood their til we recognized him. We quickly made room for the pizza's. We were starrrrrrrrrrving! The server went back to get our plates. Everyone was scrambling to replace eating utinsils and refill drinks and then for the first time... and only time of the night.... we were settled down.
I stood up and said.... "lets bless the food!" I couldn't believe what was coming out of my mouth. Its not something I do often in a public place. I sort of checked myselt and kind of looked around expecting to see everyone staring back at me like I was weird. But what I saw was everyone's head bowed and ready for a prayer. Wow. It took a second to look around at everyone. "this is awesome" I thought. I don't know why but I felt that it was the coolest moment of the whole day. I looked over at little man sitting next to D-bug with his arms stretch out across the table. He was looking at me smiling. I whispered.. "we're gonna say a prayer..." and looked over at d-bug and giggled and folded his arms and closed his eyes.
The prayer was given. The reverence after lasted all of 5 seconds until the commotion began again.

The Pizza was good: 1 large pepperoni/sausage and 1 large Robbers roost!
I highly recommend the Robbers Roost it's my new favorite. That was a good pizza: Grilled chicken pieces, tomatoes, olives, mushrooms & green onions on our creamy garlic sauce.
Only a couple of kids were brave enough to try it.
We ordered 2 pasta dishes as well:

Chicken Alfredo
Spiral pasta & grilled chicken smothered in a rich and creamy Alfredo sauce, topped with parmesan and mozzarella cheese, then baked to perfection.




Three Cheese Marinara
Hot fresh pasta in three cheese marinara sauce, baked with a layer of melted Italian cheeses.


Kind of like a Macaroni and cheese with tomato sauce.





Personally, I think tomato sauce in macaroni and cheese messes up the macaroni and cheese. But it was an OK dish i guess.





I guess with our mouths full and everyone starting to settle down, we realized there was music playing. It was a good ol song from my high school days so I belted out a few verses. I don't know what happened next.... It had to be Dip and Dap because they were up in the middle of the restaurant...
and the dancing began!

There was break dancing, there was sliding, there was the sprinkler dance, the shopping cart dance, the worm or caterpiller or whatever they're calling it these days.Even the Michael Jackson Thriller dance and some freakish mummy looking dance Little man was running across the floor and then sliding like super man. I even got up and danced too. I caught the eye of the cashier and cook who where looking at us as if they wished they could join. I gave the cook a wink and he winked back. I went up to him and said...


"Y'all don't mind, do ya?"


" No Way! I'm so glad I was scheduled to work tonite, this is AWESOME! I hope we see you all again, do you live around here?"

I told him the break down of where we were all from. He was impressed, Ogden, Midvale, Riverton and Provo.

"How do you all know each other?" He asked

"These are my daughters and sisters! We're all harem of little man over there" I smiled.


He laughed and looked at my crew just as Doodle bug grabbed little man's hand and started doing some kind of dance.



"Well... this is awesome!" he said... "and I hope you all come back again this was so fun for us."





We were interrupted because little man needed to get to the restroom... QUICK! He and I raced off and I sent him into the Men's room. ON the way back to the table I looked at the floor and noticed chunks of dried mud in different spots on the floor. I guess we had left our mark.



I looked up and the 2 mellow kids were starting to wind down.... until the 2 wild one's started having a dance off which, by the way sent us all into fits of laughter.

Then one of them, I believe it was Dip, stopped and with wide eyes took off into the distance. OH NO! I thought. They spotted the game room. It was as if they didn't recognize it befor, but it was there the whole time.

Eventually everyone but the 2 bugs and Aunty were in the game room. It was more like a jungle room or a game of "How many of us can we get on this horse? How many of us can we get on the Motorcycle? How many of us can crowd into this space. And just how loud can we be? Then they would add lib some sort of dramatic motorcycle or horse back riding scene.



Little man made it out of the restroom and joined in the jungle room. We actually put a quarter in the horse and let him ride it.. .and he was interrupted by the others once they saw the horse was actually moving for him... everyone piled on. It was crazy!



Eventually I was starting to settle down and reality was setting in. It was an hour til midnight and time get the kids to their perspective homes. Tomorrow would be Sunday and it was going to be a pretty rough day.



Inspite of moans and groans we started rounding up the kids. I had them call their mother's to let them know they'd be home within the hour. We gathered our muddy coats and shoes and hats and gloves. We stacked our dishes and cups and the pizza pans for our servers and left them a really big tip. Walked out side and it was snowing!

Dip being from Mississippi origionally had never really seen snow befor today. The girl was running and screaming through the parking lot:
"It's snowing! It's snowing! It's snowing!"

This same routine happened earlier before we even hit the corn maze. She came running back our way and grabbed Dap and they jumped up and down dancing in a circle chanting
"snow!" "snow!" "snow!'
Which in turn got us all excited with more fits of laughter.

"wow" I thought. They just keep going and going and going. It was awesome.
Even the car ride home was crazy with laughing and dancing.

"Hey, what are we doing for November?" Someone said.

"we have free games for bowling!" someone else said.

I looked at the tickets and its only free bowling on M-F before 5 pm.

All the adults looked at each other.

It was deteremined that the day after thanksgiving would be perfect for bowling! While the rest of the world is out Christmas shopping, me and my crew will be throwing balls and probably ourselves down alleys.



So if you happen to be cruisin by a bowling alley and see about 10 people rolling on the ground and falling all over each other laughin... give us a shout out!

*i bet you all wish you could see most of the video's and pictures of the night. I'm not comfortable with posting the faces of kids on the world wide web without their parents permission. So there! :-P

Grazin & Corn Mazin' Part 1

It was with great anticipation that I woke up Saturday morning! It was also 5:00 am! Yeah, that part wasn't so great but it was going to be a great day anyway. I lay in bed going through the events of the day in my mind:
Leadership meeting in Midvale at Golden Coral
Back to Provo by Noon with my Pot O Soup for Super Saturday activity.
Check football scores
To the mall to get the final touches for my Halloween costume
Nap.... this was going to be essential to my mood and energy because in the evening it was all about...
THE CORN MAZE!

(The Maze!)

That's right! My favorite fall activity! This year, I'd be taking my favorite people with me:
Sandra- she blew in with hurricane Katrina 3 years ago and decided to stay in Utah
Lyn- My sister the transporter/chaperon. Everyone Calls her "Aunty Lyn"
Me- I'm Karyn, Kaydee, Mama Kay.... Shoot, I don't even know what to call myself anymore.
And my crew... which consist of 6 kids from oldest to youngest (ages 17-5):

Doodle bug
k-Bug
Dray
Dip
Dap
and Little man or Grand Master J.

We'd all been looking forward to this for about 3 weeks! only 3 of us had been to the corn maze before. So it'll be fun! I was excited. Tired, but excited.

I went through my morning with the greatest of ease and it proved to be a bumpy afternoon. But when we got around to Corn mazin... It was all about the fun.

The weather was the worse weather for the activity. I took a poll. And let me just say.... My kids... they ain't no wimpy kids. Plan B and C totally shot down. Come rain, sleet, snow or darkness of night.... They were going mazin. And it was raining, snowing, sleeting and in the darkness of night. We wanted to do the haunted maze.... but the weather was so bad, the
Haunters did come to haunt. HAHAH! The haunters were scared off by the weather. ( yes, i know that was corny :)

We get our tickets and decide to break off into groups: Sandra, Aunty and the mellow kids which consisted of... the 2 bugs.
That left me with the hyper kids: Dray, Dip, Dap and Little man. ( 3-D and Grand master J was my crew!) They were hyped and ready to go. Each group had an adult with a cell phone, a torch bearer (flashlight holder) and a Navigation Specialist to be in charge of the map.
The ticket master gave our instructions:
"be very careful cuz I don't have insurance if you brake a bone or something. The maze is muddy, wet, slick and has puddles. Enter at your own risk! Here's your map, the rules are posted. Have fun!"

Now any sane adult would have turned around and hit the bowling alley. Nope, not me and my crew... we were off and running! We left the mellow crew and ran through the entrance.
The Ultimate corn maze has may purposes:
1. inside each good cornmaze are hidden post which are listed on the map. The goal is to find all the post before you get tired, cold, frustrated and lost. You find all the post, you get prizes :)
2. All good corn mazes have a circle of doom! This is path that lead you in a confused circle. You'll usually be in the circle and find yourself in the same spot at least twice before you realize it's a circle you've been tracking in for the last 15 minutes. You will revisit this spot a few times befor leaving
3. Haunters. These are people dressed up in masks with spooky stuff like chainsaws and scary masks and grim reapers hidden through out the maze waiting to scare the pee out of everyone. 4. It must big. I mean so big that you feel like pioneer children ... (nuf said)

5. It must have "stalkers" ( I made another corny funny) These are actually workers that roam the maze and make sure rules are being followed. They will also guide you out when the corn crazies hit and ya just can't take no more.


(see rules above)

About 10 steps into the maze... we were literally stopped in our tracks with thick mud!

"DAAAAAAANG!" I said. We were slipping and sliding all over the place. I looked down at little man's feet. He had opened toes slippers/sandals with socks on.
"DAAAANG little man! You let me know when you get cold and we'll stop Ok?"
"ok!" he nodded
I slipped and wavered in my footing and let out a "yelp!" Little man looked up at me and said... "you hold my hand!"
I laughed... yeah, it was probably a good idea so he could hold me up. The 3-D's were about 15 yards ahead of us. I called out to them to stop and wait up. They go to the first passageway and stopped, I'm sure it was more because they couldn't decide on which direction to go.... we caught up to them, just as they bolted the direction they wanted to go.

Little man and I followed. The 3-D's rounded a corner and I could hear them screaming!
"Post 1 We found post1"
And so they did! They took the hole punch attached to the post and punched out #1 on our map..... Then we were off and found post # 2!
We sloshed and slipped and stomped through the mud. "oooopppS!" screamed little man!
"What's up boy?" I inquired..
"my shoe!" I looked down and his foot was in the air, behind him was his shoe. Stuck in the mud! We laughed! I picked the shoe up and placed it in front of him and he slipped it back on. This process would be repeated several times during the night.

The mud was thick. Each step was harder and heavier than the next. Mud would accumulate and pack together until the weight of your foot was so heavy that gravity would cause the mud to fall off and the process would start all over again. You could hear the suction of your shoes and feel the glops of mud hitting the back of your legs when you lifted your foot to walk.




(our muddy "feetzes" less than 5 minutes into the maze)

The maze was treacherous! We sloshed in the mud, slipped in the puddles and slid on the wet corn stalks. We were laughing, screaming, yelping, singing all the while. The D's were indecisive about which we to go at each turn so after about 2o minutes we decided it was little man's turn to lead us. He was our torch bearer. So we put him out in front and said..
"ok.. which way?"

He would look and say...
this way"
and away he would go. We'd look at each other unsure. He'd look back at us as if to say....
"Well I'm going this way, and y'all can just stand there if ya want"
and off he would go. There's 2 things I liked about little man leading:
1. he just knew he was leading us to Glory. He walked with such confidence.
2. he always led us to dry Ground. It was as if Moses came and parted the red sea and we walked on try ground.
There was no sluggin through the mud when little man lead us. We called that: P.I.T Priesthood in Training! And it was cool. Weird, but very very cool!

(P.I.T)

As time passed we also found post #'s 3,4, 5, &9. Laughin, joking, singing and all of that. We passed other groups of people along the way who simply looked miserable!
I decided to call and check on the Mellow crew.... So we phoned my sister to see how they're doing.
"hello"
"hey, where are y'all at?" I asked... Ok people, now think about it, where was she?
And that's exactly what she said...
"umm think about it... I"M IN THE MIDDLE OF A CORN FIELD!" I could hear Sandra the 2 bugs and laughing their fool heads off.
"Oh, yeah!" I said. "well Im going to scream and tell us if you can hear us so we can gage how far away we are from you.."
So me and my crew start screaming.

"Can you hear us? " I said into the phone? I could hear the bugs crackin up in the back ground...

"Well, you ARE screaming into the phone in my ear...." She said.
UH OH! I had hit and I didn't even know it: THE CORN CRAZIES!

Yeah, the corn crazies are when you've been in the maze so long that you start to lose your mind. Everything is funny, and silly and some what demented! This is the really fun part of the maze, the only sad thing is that it's short lived... and the then come the claustrophobia.
About an hour into this thing, I'm starting to get tired. The 3-D's had taken charge again and we found another post! Cept this post had no number on it and 2 hole punches. My navigation specialist had given up on the map about 30 minutes ago. ( Make sure your navigation specialist can follow a map.)
Not knowing where we were and what post, we just punched # 7 and called it good. And then we were off. We walked about 15 minutes and found another post. It was a post with no number and 2 whole puncher. (haha!) Wait... we just did this. So we took off in a different direction, about 5 minutes later we found a post with no number and you guessed it 2 whole punchers.
And then another group came right up behind us. And then a 3rd group.
All said.. "hey, were just here!"
"AAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!" I screamed! THE CIRCLE!

The circle will make a person go totally insane. People have died in the circle. I glanced around to the left and quickly to the right.. searching for the skeletal remains of those who have never seen the light of day again because of the circle. We needed a plan.... someone to get us far and away...
"little man, Lead us out!" I commanded.
With that confidence he had he looked around and pointed..
"That way!"
and on he marched. we followed. I know if nothing else we would be walking on dry ground.

(That way!)
My ankles were bothering me at this point and I knew they would betray me by morning's light.

Just as expected we were soon on dry ground. We reached a long corridor of stalks and in the distance was another post! We were excited as we ran toward it. As we got closer, I stopped dead in my tracks. It was a post, no number.... 2 hole punchers. WOW!

I bit my tongue in order not to cuss. They were looking at me... trying not to laugh. And then we all busted out laughing!
"OK" I announced! "We are officially lost!"
they giggled.
"And we're going THAT WAY!" I said & I pointed. It didn't matter that we had just come from that way.
They ran ahead of me as much as they could run... and then... it happened:

I stepped into the mud and slipped to the right... I yelped! I stepped to the left and twisted my body to compensate for over correcting... I stepped to the left again and my right foot slipped behind me. I screamed! "SPLAT!" I could see the silhouettes of the kids stop and turn. Then the torch bearer shined his light and started walking back towards me.
"she fell!" I heard a familiar voice say.
"Oh my goodness she fell!" It was dip.
"Hey, lets steal her camera and take pictures of her" They ran toward me, and grabbed my camera from the mud and started taking pictures!
Hey guys don't mind me. I'm just sitting here in the wet yukky mud and corn. Just make sure you get my good side. So after a few more mud poses, they helped me up.

(this is SO NOT my good side)

We started off again and about 10 feet later ... "splat!"
I looked behind me and yelled
"we have another man down! Another man down!"
Dip had fallen!

(they got her good side)

The corn crazies had hit us all. I looked at us all. We were a shameful site indeed. I looked down at our feetz. They were muddy and caked over. I looked at little man's feet.
"Are you cold little man?" I asked
He nodded. I pulled his hood on his head.
"Are your feet cold?" I asked? shook his head. WOW. Them must be some good socks I said because they were caked. Well insulated I guess.

"Ok crew, it's time to get out!" I said.

We continued to walk along the path we were going. I wanted to get as far from the circle as possible so I walked to the very edge. Im not sure what end.. and it didn't matter, because eventually we hit every corner.... and still couldn't find our way out. But we did find post 10!
Being on the very edge you could see outside of the maze. We saw stores, A field, The pumpkin patches.
"can we get a pumpkin?"
asked little man shining his light on them.
"Baby, we need to get out!" I answered.
"yeah, we need to get out" He repeated.

We saw cars passing by.. I fought back the urge to run to the fence and yell
"HELP! HELP!" I stood there, looking and feeling like a lost and dirty orphan hanging on the fence.
The path along the edges weren't long before they dragged you back into the actual maze. Soon the signs of civilization would be gone again. I was getting claustrophobic and Dip announced she had to use the bathroom. This bring a whole new element to corn mazin'. We needed to buckle down and really get serious about getting out.
I phoned my sister.... " hey, she said... We're at post # 6!"
"really, we haven't found it yet, where is it?" I asked. lol...
"Umm....Karyn..." she said..
"I know, I know... It's in the corn"
"well, and don't y'all have a map?" she said.
THE MAP! I totally forgot about the map. I hung up and I called my navigation specialist over and asked for the map.
"I don't have it, you do" she said.
"Uh...I do?" I asked? "I thought i gave it to you?"
"I put it in your pocked like an hour ago" she said.
I checked my pockets and there is was, twisted and damp. I unfolded it and just stared.

"Well if we knew where we were that would help, huh guys?"

Just then a dark torchless shadow walked out of the rows of corn. It was a Stalker! Scared the corn outta me!
"hey" dap Pointed the direction we were headed... "is this the way out? she asked.

"Nope" said the guy "But I can show you out!"
YAYE! We cheered. Our hero!

We followed close behind. After about 5 minutes of walking.. it was dap who said..

"WAIT! We only have to get 2 more punches # 8 & 6!"

I groaned inwardly. "AW MAN!" And then Dip backed her up.

" I thought you had to pee!" I said to her.
"Well I don't have to go that bad"

Our hero said... "well I can show to post 6 if you want it's on the way" Yaye... he really was a hero..
So he veered off toward the middle part of the maze..... and low and behold we passed the real # 7. So we punched it.

The guide said... # 6 is a little difficult to find... the post is missing from it. I stopped in my tracks..... "uh.... Does it have 2 whole punches attached to it?" I asked..
"Naw.... That's # 8" He said.
Whew! Because even hero's get lost in the circle. My phone rang it was the mellow crew...
"Hey i said.... We're headed out! IM DONE" i said.
"ok. well we can be done she said.." we think you guys are really close... one of the guides just passed us and said another guide is leading you out."

Wow, that is close.
I affirmed it.
"How many did yall get," She asked

"got em all, I guess # 6 doesn't have a sign on it?"
She said. .yeah, but there are signs pointing toward it, have you seen the signs?"

"well, lemme see, I've seen a mud puddle, I've seen cars going by, I've seen... corn, I've seen Magna and Kennecott Mines.. and a the exit to Paris, But I have not seen a sign for post # 6!"

she laughed.

We found post 6 and rejoiced i the fact that we had found all the post and were headed home.
My steps got stronger. I smiled. We sang "pioneer children sang as they walked... and walked... and walked...."

Another 15 minutes and there is was.... The exit sign.

My eyes welled up with tears

(we made it)

I stumbled toward it. Bowed before it. Kissed it.
We had made it out!

WE turned in our raggedy map and claimed our prizes! Free Fries and Ice cream At Mc Donalds, A free Game of Bowling. WOO HOOO! We were jumping up and down and life was good!

We waited another 2o minutes for the mellow crew.

We stood at the exit until we saw their silhouettes emerge down the path.
My crew broke out in song... "Come, Come Ye Saints..." And threw our arms around them in Joy to be reunited again.

"HEY! what took y'all so long?" I frowned.

"we were headed out until we heard you had them all So we decided, we weren't coming out til we had them all too."

We looked at our watches.... and couldn't believe the time. It just under an hour and a half since we first got there.
IT FELT LIKE DAYS

haha! "well it's time to get some pizza!"

We headed to our vehicles to the pizza place. I didn't know it then... but the night really was just beginning!


(Grand Master J's shoes
the tops & bottoms)

http://ablackmormongirl.blogspot.com/
(my life really is like that corn maze)