May 05, 2009

There is Always A Better, Brighter Way to Live

I talked to a man at work today. "How are you today Miss Karyn?" He said.
"I AM WONDERFUL, How 'bout yourself Mr Lilly?"
"Wonderful?? WOW< really? It is so nice to hear such a lovely positive voice on the phone. I Don't even want my money back I just like hearing the kindness of your voice!"

I.WAS.BEAMING! I love the reaction I get when folks ask me how I'm doing. I've pretty much taken "FINE" and "ALRIGHT" out of my vocabulary. I'm no longer living a generic life so my answer will no longer be Generic. I also notice when I ask "How are you today?" I really mean it, it's no longer just another "greeting" like "Hi" or " What's up?" or "HEY!"

There is much to be said about looking for the bright and positive things in life and in other people.

There's even more to be said about FINDING IT!.. Some people look all their lives for the good and positive things AND NEVER FIND IT! Is there something wrong with the look, or is the world in such a state that there is nothing good left anymore?

Quite frankly I'm enjoying being that finder of light in others. Finding it add to being positive. It really is a great feeling and makes the world a who new place to be in. A better place to be in.

Im realizing how much our perception of the world around us has to do with what we draw to us.

Let's take Drama for instance. Some people have a no Drama Clause. They avoid it, don't create it don't participate in it. SO THEY THINK.
What is more dramatic than turning away from a situation that needs to be discussed, sorted out and solved? You think just by glossing something over and then ignoring it will make it go away and cause you to escape drama free? WRONG. It come back with a vengeance. It interrupts current and future issues when not handled. It really does create... "Same Production, Different Cast" with YOU as the director AND usually the starring or co-starring role. Been there done that.

I call the Bullcrap card on NO Drama! The minute you declare it, it gang jumps on you. It invades your subconscious and your mind. Just because you don't admit it, doesn't make it not so. The truth isn't any less true because folks don't believe it.

I've learned the joy in Taking responsibility for what does and more importantly what doesn't work in my life. There is no shame in saying.... I messed up, I can do better. Or I apologize for being thoughtless. No But... or excuses or justifications. Simply... I messed up, I know it, I'm sorry, I'll do better. I have a much higher respect for THAT person than the one who finds fault and blame on everyone around him for HIS/HER short comings. We all have them. It's what makes us human. And it's soo disheartening AND TACKY to hear someone put off their responsibilities and issues on being someone elses fault instead of just owning up.

I enjoy a good honest day's work. I was once told.."I know just exactly what to do and say to impress the right people... and then I just sit back until I make my next move." Seriously.... NOT IMPRESSIVE to me. That's got " I'm a butt kisser and a suck up and do my job when I need to, but for the most part I'm a slacker when no one else is around" Someone who has this habit or attitude doesn't realize it carries over into all aspect of their lives. Can you imagine having a relationship with that person? They'll put in some effort when there is only shakey ground. I like working hard, earning my keep. I like being a team leader and a team player. If you can't be both there will be problems in your personal life and relationships as well. No one can or should or was meant to be the boss at all times.

Someone at work called me the Department Cheerleader. AUGH! Yeah, Im not the one. This same person asked me if I "ever had a bad day."
I laughed at her and said "I'm actually having one now!"
She said she just couldn't tell and would never have guessed it.
"well, Complaining about it would only make me more miserable and the people around me I DECIDED to change it and make it a good day." Then I gave her a lollipop and walked away.
It's all about perspective. At work I decided no matter how bad or awful the person on the other end of the phone was, it was NOT going to effect how well I served them as a customer. I will always do my job the best of my ability with a cheerful attitude. No way I'm gonna let them get to me. So far, so good!

The next goal is to bring that attitude out of the work place. What if we all went home to our families and decided that no matter how upset, tired, frustrated or "whatever" the people in our house were We were going to be the best Father, Mother, Sister, Brother, Son or Daughter we could possibly be anyway?
And why is it we save our best selves for Customers, bosses, coworkers and strangers? If we treated our families like we treat our bosses and customers, I wonder how few divorces, separations and foster kids there would be in the world?
OUR FAMILIES SHOULD BE OUR BEST CUSTOMERS! These are the people who clean up after you, feed you, let you move in, give you a few dollars, and in some cases a kidney or something. Why do we not save our best selves for those we are supposed to love most?
Well let me tell ya, I've started doing this at home. I live with my daughter and my sister. And it's working. I feel myself wanting to add more and more the comfort and peace of the home atmosphere. And that doesn't just mean avoiding issues. We work them out. Not with blame. We know when we've done something and are doing something that's not conducive to the house hold or fair to the people living in it. We take ownership and try to improve on it.

And let me say this: When you have a true desire to improve and make changes... you don't wait because you learn there is no point in it. Laziness will have you take babysteps. The time for positive improvements is and always will be NOW!

I say this because we are loyal to our habits. Good, Bad and UGLY we are loyal to our habits, because they are familiar and we know how to deal with them. There is fear in change. Fear that we may fail or someone will find a weakness and see us less attractive or less perfect. One of the sexiest traits in the world is Confidence and true confidence comes from recognizing your weaknesses, improving upon them and KNOWING that those you love will continue to love you through it all. THAT's SEXY! That's attractive, not fake arrogance.

I tell you, LIFE IS GOOD. There are miracles surrounding use everyday. I notice them even more than ever before. There is ALWAYS ALWAYS something brighter and more divine to see and it surrounds us each and every day. I am grateful to have gone through whatever was needed to be able to experience this "new world" I've been living in. We are meant to have joy. Not guilty pleasure. Not temporary Satisfaction. Not Substitution but Real live, touch me, feel me, hear me, smell me, taste me human interaction joy.
If you can't find it, then you aren't doing something right because people all over the world are enjoying life and it's out there.

When must understand we are every day sowing and everyday reaping what we've already sown. If the harvest is stale and rotten, you can't blame the farmer next door for your tainted crop. Well you can, but it will never fix YOUR crop.

Part of the joy of life is taking responsibility for our failures because those things we suffer at the hand of others may make us dizzy for a little while, but if we stay dizzy and fall and wallow on the ground, it then becomes our own doing.

LIFE IS GOOD, believe that. And times are hard. The wiser we get the more we'll understand that our wants and needs coincide. How wonderful would it be live life in such a way that the only thing you really want and need is Shelter, food, clothing and money enough to live on? How wonderful would it be if we didn't need the cable tv or the xbox or laptop or latest cell phone? What if we're happy with a car that functions well and gets us to where we need to go? It is difficult pining and waiting to have enough money for the latest doo-dad. Why not take the money and send Mom or grandma flowers "JUST BECAUSE?" or take Grandpa or Pops out for lunch and an afternoon movie? Gather the neices and nephews together for an 99 cent ice cream and swinging at the park? These are truly the things that make life good and worth while.

Life.IS.GOOD. I Promise. And I hope you are put through whatever trial, trauma,hardship, blessing or refiner's fire you need to go through to live it well.