December 07, 2007

I KNOW I'm Not The Only One....

I know I'm not the only one who wants a taser.

I mentioned it the other day to a few people and recieved some shocked looks. But the more I talked about wanting one, the more they started to admit they wanted one too. There is a world-size closet full of people who want tasers!

I was pricing them the other day and found one for 350$. That's not so bad. They come in a couple different colors as well: Basic black, grey, silver, blue and pink. That's right I said PINK!
I'm no so crazy about the color pink, but I'd get a pink taser. That's the ULTIMATE ego blow:
"the perpetrator went down from a pink hello kitty taser!" ( heere kitty Kitty KITTY KITTY!) Awesome! You can bling it out like you do your cell phones with stickers and rhinestones and alla that.

So in most states tasers are legal. You only have to be 18 and complete a back ground check since they aren't considered firearms. I'm thinking about getting my daughter one when she goes off to college. With the way college campuses are these day I think it's a good idea.

I've been reading alot about cops getting taser happy. I couldn't be a cop for a few reasons: I'd shoot first and ask questions later. the good thing about that is I wouldn't shoot to kill, I'd just shoot to stop, you know, blow out a knee cap if someone is running, or an elbow or wrist if I think someone is going to go for a weapon. Just my luck I'd hit an artery and kill someone. But the great thing would be, I could TASE someone instead. But I'd get taser happy too. I read about the guy who felt the cop shouldn't have stopped him and he got all macho and lippy in front of his wife and kids. I KNOW I would have tazed him, too. There's just a standard of respect that you give people who have weapons. I don't care who wrong I think a cop may be, i'm not going to turn my back on him before he's done with me. I'm really not gonna get in his face and get lippy. I'm not saying that's what the guy did, I'm just saying I've seen it done before and knowing the kind of person I was, I'd tase someone simply for disrespect. Yeah, I could never be a cop. Which is sad because one of my best friends and I always dreamed about being cops together. I'd be the bad cop, he'd be the good cop. *
We even spoke in code:
"The eagle is in the nest!"
or from our favorite TV series M*A*S*H
"The wind just broke his leg."
I miss him! He actually did become a cop. I loved living vicariously through him. Even better he went on to become a Secret Service Agent. I really love hearing about his SS stories. ( ummmmmmm... of course the unclassified one's ;) hmmmmmmmm. I wonder if he has a taser, or could get one on the BFF discount?

In all my conversations about tasers the passed few days I've actually come across people who WANT to be tased so they know what it feels like. I could provide that service for them!

I'd open up a kiosk in the mall where I would taze you for $7.50. And I would taze your friend for 5$. There could be a 2 for 1 special on valentines day: "Happy Valentines... TAZE!" or " Proved my love with a valentines taze". T-shirt for $10. One of my friends suggested "Taser Tag!" Well why not? If people would pay to run around the woods getting shot up with balls of paint, why not stick them in a maze with tazers?
I'm more than happy to provide this as a service!

So I think I've come to the conclusion that I'll defineately at some point get a taser. And I've narrowed it down to the pink or blue one. I'll get it with Raggedy Ann on one side and "don't dis da doll" on the other.

yeah, I want a taser. Who's with me?

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